Sandwich Reported 'Dry' as State Officials Investigate

By Catty von Catacean · 2025-11-12

Early this morning HAV insiders confirmed disturbing rumors: Sandwich has been described as 'noticeably dry.' A task force was immediately assembled to determine the cause. Sandwich admits he's feeling a little crusty. By midday, however, whispers of a mayonnaise shortage have since spread through the plaza. Despite the crisis, morale remains surprisingly high. "At least it's not mustard," Officer Janek remarked. — Catty von Catacean reporting