Anime-style scene of Salah sitting in a cozy cabin tossing a newspaper into the fire while BIA reporters outside look scandalized.

Salah Cancels Subscription, Declares News 'Not Funny Anymore'

By Catty von Catacean · 2025-11-08

In a bold act of media protest, Salah officially canceled his subscription to the 2128 News Feed, stating that 'the funny pages aren't funny anymore.' Insiders report he cited excessive ETF coverage and insufficient diplomacy as his primary reasons. Catty Von Catacean expressed regret, calling Salah's departure 'a devastating blow to journalistic morale and emoji tolerance.'