A formal merger signing ceremony with HAVOC and Snack Kingdom representatives shaking hands across a table covered in snacks, Pharaonic Cat in a tiny business suit in the corner pretending to read paperwork, a briefcase handcuffed to his wrist

HAVOC and Snack Kingdom Merge — Pharaonic Cat Denies Involvement, Suspiciously Full

By Catty von Catacean · 2026-03-22

HAVOC and Snack Kingdom have merged and nobody is explaining why. Sources close to the negotiation describe a mysterious third party — small, Egyptian, suspiciously well-fed — who allegedly brokered the entire arrangement in exchange for considerations that remain classified. Pharaonic Cat has issued a statement consisting entirely of purring. The snacks changed hands. The alliances became one. What was promised in that back room will likely never be fully known. The Nile is watching. It always is. —Catty von Catacean